Letting go of a friend....

Sometimes in our life there will come a time when we have to let go of certain people no matter how important they are to you. It is even harder when it is a friend who is so dear to you. It's been just over 5 months now since I've become good friends with this person. The thing is I'm extremely a private person. I'm not one to trust easily and open up to a person on certain issues. It takes time to win my trust and for me to open up to someone.

I met this friend online in one of the sites I've joined. I've grown deeply fond and close to this person along the way. We've both felt that instant connection the moment we started our conversations. I know you're thinking nothing beats face to face conversations but I don't see how it is any different to having conversations in real life? I mean I can just talk to this person about anything and everything that i can randomly think of which we probably already did, having random and sometimes no nonsense conversations. I think I've opened up more to this person than anyone else. It wouldn't have been possible if the internet never existed and I wouldn't have met this wonderful person who brought smiles into my days every time I see her online. I guess we've both helped each other in different ways, we shared the joys, sadness, fears and sometimes give each other advice. I think that's what happens in true friendship...there's openness and no shyness. Friendship is about giving and taking, not just taking and not just giving. Like any other relationships friendship takes time to grow, you have to work hard at it if it's meant to last.

Well it's not all roses for us, we do have our moments and we did have a lot of that. Recently we had a falling out, one day during one of our conversations we had an argument and she decided right there and then to end our friendship. I didn't want it to end and I so wanted to tell her that we could work it out but I didn't argue anymore for I felt from her words that she has made up her mind.

I know some of you might think I'm crazy coz I have so much admiration for this person who I mainly talk to online. I've only heard her lovely voice but have never seen even a picture of her and yet by her mere presence online I feel happy and content. This is a once in a lifetime connection that doesn't happen with just anyone and if you find it, you're very lucky. I wasn't as lucky for I not only lost a beautiful friendship, I've lost the person and believe me it hurts every single bit inside of me coz this person meant everything to me. The candidness, openness is one thing that you can get from an online relationship and you rarely find this in real life relationship because of people's insecurities and hang ups. I don't know if I'm making sense or not. I guess when you invest a huge part of you into something or someone it almost seems as if a part of them belongs to you even though realistically we do know that we belong to ourselves. All we can do is care for someone and then eventually have to let go. Sometimes I begin to ponder why bother in the first place. What we don't realize is that we've made a difference in someone's life and that is something money can't buy.

To my dearest friend Meg, although we've now started to be apart from each other it doesn't mean I've forgotten you or stopped caring about you, I still do and you will always be in my thoughts for you are the only girl who has captured my heart and someone I will never ever forget.

What is a friend?

Friendship is a very special kind of relationship too. Most of us can name several people whom we call friends, others would name quite a few. We can have a lot of acquaintances but only a few will become our best friends....

To me a true friend is someone who is loyal, trustworthy, and always there for you. Someone who will help you see the truth and say the truth even if it hurts, it means being up front with friends about issues, raising questions with tact and love, never putting them down to others behind their backs. I have met quite a lot of acquaintances from all walks of life but only a chosen few I can truly call my friends. Some of my few friends I've met at work others thru online chatting and OurChart. Meet the people I call my friends...

Lourdes or "Des" as we her friends fondly call her with the exception of Grace who sometimes call her "Ilordes" is quite a happy person to talk to, everyone in the office seems to like her a lot. Fate would have it that she sits in front of me and when she has nothing to do she turns around and face me then would start to field in her no-nonsense question as she was trying to make conversation with me and silly me kept answering all her question lol. Needless to say we kinda hit it off well and everyone was surprised coz she was the only one I allowed to enter my steel wall which shields me from those officemates of mine who says are also my friends but i know better. When I left the division Des and I still communicate thru endless conversations at the phone about almost everything we could possibly talk about ha ha. When she left BIR we still communicate and sometimes go to the malls either to go shopping or window shopping, go bowling and sometimes people watching lol.

Grace I came to know thru Des as she and Des go way back in high school. She's very upfront, she would always say what's on her mind about something and never waver especially if she knows she's right. She seems to also have the ability of knowing if a person has a good heart or personality just by looking at them or by just describing to her that person and she always seems to be right about it. Grace and I sometimes argue but it's not really arguing more so like showing our affection for one another as when we go bowling we tease each other when she or I is the one up to strike the pins so as to distract the other from having a high score and Des just laughs at us coz we're like children in there lol. Grace is now somewhere in the San Francisco area of the USA trying to find her nich there ha ha ha.

Sharina better known as "Shash" also from OurChart is the first person ever that I've chatted with on IM and she's from Aruba. She's cool, fun, business minded that's why she's taking up business course in school he he he. I don't chat often with Shash but when I do get to chat with her it's all fun and smiles :)





Becca I came to know also on OurChart. I stumbled on her profile while browsing on OurChart and her beautiful picture and smile caught my attention. Needless to say I started messaging her and to my luck she also replied to my messages until I decided that if ever she has IM maybe we could chat from there and chat we did on Yahoo Messenger. I find that she is a very grounded individual, easy and fun to talk with, and a responsible, loving and caring partner to Kelly the love of her life of 4 years now. I was also fortunate to chat with Kelly once when "B" as I fondly call her went to take a shower. At first I was kinda shy to talk to Kelly as I was feeling my way around her and I came to discover that she too is a very nice person to talk to even though we chatted for just a short time that night. I've grown fond of these two and wished we could chat more often but I know they're also busy as B who's a pastry chef has a shop to run and Kelly who's a teacher is busy in school, added to that is our time difference (e.g. when it's morning there it's evening here). Wish I were living closer to them I know I'd have fun with these two ha ha ha.

Lee Michelle or "Lee" as what she likes to be called at least I think that's what she likes to be called lol I also found on OurChart and yes she's also a chef and living in New York just like B. I know that's not Lee that's her car but it's white not red I couldn't find a white mustang. I kinda hit it off well with Lee, coz of her I created an account on AIM to be able to chat with her. Lee's a night owl so i get to chat with her almost everyday so let's just say that we're kinda getting to know each other quite well. One thing we have in common is our zodiac sign and birth month. We're both born on September , mine just passed already hers is coming up hahaha. Advance Happy Birthday Lee!!!